I think I just made about a million cookies :) Seriously. But I love making cookies so that's a good thing. I also finished several projects that I was working on. The CC girls are doing a holiday gift exchange and I finally finished my lucky lady's gift wrapping and sealing up etc. I feel like I've gotten so many things done today! Plus I've been really good about saving money in my spending account and now I feel like a billionaire. You know that feeling when you can splurge on something and it's not a big deal? I love it. This must be what it feels like to be rich with cash ;)


I've been doing lots of sewing lately, trying to catch up on some things, finish others, and think about starting even more :) Isn't that what sewing is all about? Also, bonus!, I think that I will be able to attend the next Birmingham quilter's guild meeting. I've never asked for time off to just do something for me before and my boss laughed when I told him what I wanted to do. Because school is finished soon for the holiday's there will be more than enough people to cover my hours which is wonderful. It's wonderful to think that I could have a morning free to do something that isn't work for me at all, it's just something that I love doing. And aren't these colors pretty together?

As always I have my sewing companions with me. Lately Huxley has been my shadow but on this evening they both decided to join me :) Have I ever mentioned how much I love having dogs? The only downside is how loud they are... and they can get pretty loud. They are watch dogs, it's what they are supposed to do right? How adorable is this picture? He just reached prime age for neutering so that will be done in the next month or two, poor little man. I found him laying like this, half way under the bed, those little legs were just too much for me to resist.


The dogs are sleeping and Jaime is finishing up some downloadable content for Boarderlands... it's all about zombies! Mmmm Brains. I don't have the grocery list with me but I'll update you on that. It came out to be around $66 which is $6 over what we have budgeted... we did get some extra things though like, a very large container of coffee for me. I swear that Walmart brand French Roast is the best coffee I've had apart from Dunkin Donuts and O'Henry's. For serious. It also goes really well with a mocha mix that I use from time to time. A little bit of that and a little bit of milk makes for an extra special morning.

Something about being home in Birmingham stresses me out just the slightest. I can't quite put my finger on it but it feels like when I'm here there is something that needs to be done ALL THE TIME. I could be cleaning, I could fold laundry, I could sweep the back porch, I really need to vacuum. The list goes on and on and on. I know this sounds funny but I think part of it is because I'm married. I feel like when Jaime's around we have to be doing things together, or if he's enjoying himself with video games or playing guitar or something that I can't be relaxing at all. I don't feel like that all the time but every now and then it really gets to me. Like today, I can't sit still. I don't know what I want to do to relax.. I guess I feel like unless my to-do list gets done I can't relax. The only problem is that my to-do list is never ending :) I do that to myself don't I? Makes me wonder if anyone else knows what that is like.


The dogs are spooning, they've been very cuddly lately; their little faces all mashed up next to each others. I got a great picture this weekend of Churchill as a sheep :) How adorable is that? We have these fleece parts that we bought when my family went to Scotland and Churchill didn't seem to mind if I pretended he was a sheep. So for posterity's sake I took lots of pictures.


Lots of things happened between Thursday morning and Saturday evening but unfortunately some of the things that didn't happen was time spent with my aunts, uncles, and, most of all, cousins. Wade and Miriam made several posts on my Facebook wall that made me really realize how wonderful it is to see my cousins every year (except this year). Some of the things that did happen, Churchill was turned into a sheep, Alabama won the Iron Bowl, ROLL TIDE!, and we visited some of our family out in Nauvoo. My mother always pronounces that nuvooo instead of Naw voo, emphasis on the Naw Mom:). Nauvoo was pretty much exactly like this picture, so whatever you take out of the picture is what our Thanksgiving was like :) An adventure and kind of crazy.


Churchill has demanded to ride in the front seat on the most recent car rides. He'll use any tactic he can, putting his head on your shoulder from the back seat, pawing at your arm, down to just giving us really dirty looks until we tell him to "come on" to the front seat. Maybe it's how he deals with being jealous of the other dog. Maybe it's his way of making sure that Hux knows who the Alpha is. It usually works, I can't stand him crying at me from the back seat for hours or trying to sneak into our laps (like we don't know he's there). Huxley, however, is way too happy to just sit in the back, he's a real dog, not a person-animal.


Something right happened with my camera on this shot, it was clear, colorful, and perfect looking. Maybe I need a new camera... maybe I'm just not a good photographer :) Either way I was pleased to see that this turned out well.

Our Puppies!

It's been long over due for two things. First for me to post pictures on this blog, and second for the dogs to have hair cuts. Can you believe that Huxley had his first hair cut at 10 weeks and now he's 7 months? That's a long time to not have your hair cut. Just to compare I took some before and after photos (I love my dogs that much). I felt the worst for Churchill because he could hardly see through the hair covering his eyes. I have a feeling that if I were a dog and I couldn't see because of the hair covering my eyes then I would be a clumsy dog, and he was. Now that they are all shaved it's like living with two rockets! They are so much faster! (because they know where they're going)

It's amazing how much they resemble some sort of shag carpet when their hair gets long. Huxley just looks like a teddy bear. Well not anymore fellas. When I got home from work on Saturday I couldn't believe that he was the same dog. Churchill, we've had him groomed many times so I knew what to expect, but Huxley? I've never seen him cut as a full sized dog, just a baby puppy. And my how adorable he is! So noble!And when his beard is brushed and laying flat he has stripes :) We're still a bit confused about the color of our dogs. They are both technically Salt and Pepper.. but Churchill looks way too light for that and Huxley is looking way too dark. On to more pictures! Churchill, the best thing about him are his expressive eyes, sweet almond eyes. His eyes are smart and knowing and aware. He really is a wonderful dog. His eyes are so big that he almost looks like a mouse in this picture, cute pink ears and all. He also looks like he's smiling. Oh and I spy a Sperry in this picture :) Love those shoes.
Super excited about our puppies and very excited to be taking them to see all grand parents over the Thanksgiving week/end. First Jaime's family and then my family. They will love the new hair cut and the dogs will love the freedom. You can run as free as you want in Nauvoo (yes that's a real place) and I hear my parents house has a fenced in back yard. They don't even know how exciting that will be :)
In other dog news (while we're at it). People say not to feed your dog chocolate, especially if they are a purebred dog. Somehow it didn't occur to me that Churchill would be tempted by the bowl of Hershey's Kisses when Jaime and I went out shopping. He's usually such a good dog, I mean, he isn't crated, he sleeps all day. Except the day that I leave out the Kisses. They say not to give your dog chocolate because it could kill them. Imagine all the caffeine in chocolate? Dog's can't handle that. (Actually once Churchill ate coffee grounds and was awake for about 24 hours straight.. jumping in and out of the tub, but that was years ago) I'll tell you the real reason you shouldn't feed your dog chocolate.

The real reason is that your dog will have the most gosh awful flatulence that you've ever experienced in your life. No joke. Churchill has been a poot factory for the past two days and it's almost unbearable being around him. Not only this, but if you feed your dog chocolate (and he doesn't know how to unwrap all the kisses.. he did unwrap about five of them and left the wrapping on the floor for me to pick up, but let's say he doesn't unwrap all of them) you will be left with a dog that poos all night long in your bedroom. Usually when there is an accident we blame Huxley. He's a puppy for Heaven's sake, sometimes he forgets! But this time when I went on clean-up duty... I saw... PLENTY of little bits of silver foil. What's wrapped in silver foil? Hershey's Kisses.
I know what you're thinking. Especially those of you without pets or small children. You're thinking, omg please shut up about your dogs. Please don't talk about their poots or their bowel movements. No one cares. But this is what happens when you have dogs, this is what happens, I guess, when you have children. And I'm sorry :) But I love my puppies and I happen to think it's really funny when they do things like eat Hershey's Kisses and then have sparkly poo. The End.

WARNING: very jumbled post. Now that I'm just writing without worrying I'm finding that I'm a very confusing blogger. So if you get lost in all of this, you can blame me :)

I think it's high time that I do some bragging on my students. I always call my Mom up and talk to her about all the students that I have and she's so patient with me on those phone conversations. Here I am going on and on about all these children she's never even met, yet somehow, she still listens and comments little interjections. I think that's what a Mom is supposed to do and I'm thinking that she loves the fact that I want to share things with her. At least that's what I hope she's thinking.
Either way, I'm proud of my students. Teaching piano gives me an immense amount of satisfaction and I often feel (like most bloggers out there) that if I don't let someone know it I can't really revel in it. I'm not a good secret keeper for my own thoughts. Not to say that I can't keep a secret, I just can't keep secrets about me! The more people who know exciting news the better, and I have exciting news about some of my students.
I was having a very difficult time encouraging two of my older students. These two are so talented and so capable of amazing things but they just don't apply themselves. The majority of my studio is younger, under 12, and they are pretty easy to encourage. It usually takes offering them a sticker for a completed piece or something larger for more work accomplished. I used to fall to candy to get them to participate well in a lesson. But things like stickers and candy just don't cut it with older students. Try telling a high schooler that you'll put a sticker on their book if they get their piece correct. Yeah, right. So I was stuck at an impass. I kept thinking, well, what did I do when I was younger? First off my parents were really on top of my practicing. I don't think I could have done it with out them. And secondly, I really wanted things like trophies and awards and I wanted to play well in competitions. I didn't fully grasp what I was capable of until years later but I still wanted to succeed. I have a hard time telling if these students understand what practicing means or if they just don't see the larger picture. Am I a bad teacher if I can't get them to understand? Tactics. What can I do to encourage someone to actually finish their theory homework before their next lesson. Obviously they don't understand why theory is so important, otherwise they would have finished it right? So what do you do?

With one student it was as easy as handing candy to a baby. Because that's what I did. I finally had to get tough and say "Look, you have to do your theory before you come to your lesson and you have to practice X amount before then too. You also have to write it all down for me on this cheesy checklist I printed off and if you don't then I'm going to eat all the candy I bought for you, in front of you". That's pretty much how it went down. I think on the next to last lesson I have with her I'll put the candy on the piano just to give her some extra motivation. And by candy I mean... far too much chocolate to give to a teenager. I told her that I would buy her as much candy as it took to get her to practice because her practicing means the world to me. It really does! So many students stop when they reach their teen years and it's very hard to get them to practice like they should. So if I can offer some Hershey's bars to someone and they get the results that I want, then yes, I will use that tactic.
The other student wasn't so easy. I said, what kind of candy do you like, I will buy you anything. She got all sweet and said, Oh you don't have to do that, don't worry about it. Blah blah blah. So I said, ok I'll buy you something else, something small to show you that I care if you practice or not. And she still was all humble and trying to be a sweet student (which she is) so then I had to revert to another tactic, and I really didn't want to go down that street. I pulled the Mom Card. You know what I'm talking about don't you. I asked her what would happen if she just "didn't have time" to do her homework for school? She said her Mom would find out and she would be in so much trouble. So I said (easy as pie) if you do not practice I will call your mother as soon as your lesson is over. That worked. I said, my offer still stands for your present so look at it this way. You practice, you get a present, you don't, your Mom gets mad. You chose.
Now the bragging part. I was highly skeptical that either of these pressures would work on either of these students. But, to my surprise and delight, they did. And for the past two weeks I have had two excellent pianists on my hands. I looked at one student and said "Can't you tell how much better you sound when you practice?". It's amazing to me to see how blind they are to it. I guess because they hear it every day as opposed to me hearing them once a week. I was thrilled when one student came in and her fingering was perfect, the last week it was a train wreck. I was like, you practiced, you wrote it down, and your fingering is perfect, that's exactly what I'm looking for!! The other student came in with her theory finished (even though she did it in class at school).
Another student has memorized his lesson pieces for me more times than not, without me asking. One student who came to me from another teacher who could not think of a way to motivate her any more, this past lesson she was so proud that she played two pieces for me from memory, more difficult pieces than what she was playing three months ago when she started with me. My day can be made perfect when a student comes to lessons like that. I am thrilled to see how excited they are, to see that they finally understand. That's what my job is all about.

I recently talked with another teacher. I was telling her how amazed I was with one of her students who was so well behaved and played quite well. That teacher told me that it took her two years to get there. She said that the student had behavior problems, would talk back, wouldn't practice, etc. I thought, two years, my goodness! It got me to thinking about students that I have had that long and I started wondering if I would have the patience to see a misbehaving student through to the end. This reminded me of one particular student. Not the talking back issue but the not practicing issue. Actually it reminded me of many of my students. I think with those students when I see them coming through and understanding or getting excited over a piece of music it's the most rewarding. I have several students who are recreational pianists, they do it for fun, they do it because it's enjoyable and something where they don't have to stress out about anything. They can forget about school, soccer, dance, or whatever else it is and just chill out :) One of these students the other day came into their lesson and I know that they don't practice much, so I don't expect a lot. But when they sat down and focused and played through something that they haven't really spent any time on, and played it perfectly, that was my moment. It was like a deep satisfaction in my middle, in my stomach, in my heart. I know I'm probably talking way too much and reading way too much into this but I wanted to get it out, just how proud I was. I've spent several years with this student and I saw them sight read something that just a week ago wasn't possible. That gave me so much hope :)

I also must say that I could be biased but the students I have now are a million times better than the students I first had when I began teaching. I don't know if that's just because I'm a different teacher than I was years ago, or if it's just that I have had a very lucky draw the past few years. Either way I'm thankful (quite nice for the Thanksgiving season) for all my students and I'm very thankful for their progress. There is nothing I love more about my job than seeing my students succeed and be happy in what they chose to do. I love watching them work hard and put in the effort and I love watching how surprised they are when they see how easy it all can be :)

Owl City

So I think I'm getting sick. Every time I swallow it hurts on one side. I really hope that this passes without a real sickness coming on, you know like sometimes your throat just hurts but then it goes away. I've been paranoid about getting the flu all fall semester with all the little ones that I teach, hands where my hands are people coughing and sneezing around me. :) I've been a Clorox queen on my piano and using hand sanitizer like it's going out of style. The sad thing about this is that I didn't teach on Thursday because of the dentist so I probably didn't get this sickness while teaching.. I just wasn't careful enough. But who am I kidding, I'll swallow fine by tonight.

Someone logged onto my facebook account at work and messed it up. I'll admit that I must not have signed out on Friday when I left. But that doesn't give someone free reign to go through it does it? My co-workers leave their facebooks up all the time. Once I put something in their status bar like Cory is the shiz or something silly like that. The person who changed me (and the reason I'm just so frustrated by it) put things in my profile like, interested in women (ha ha) or 'Hates all Religion' and other things. But they didn't stop there, they started inviting tons of people to be my friend. I'm still going through and unfriending people. I'm a really big fan of only being friends with people on your facebook if you're actually friends with them, not if you know them kind of thing. But this person friended friended people I used to go to church with as a child, very conservative people, and they also friended tons of my students (don't ask how they found them because I'm still figuring that out). I'm very tempted to have a conversation with my boss over this because that's my job. I teach children, they don't understand jokes like, Carrie is interested in women, or Carrie hates all religion. That's my reputation. And sure you can say, well you left your facebook open. I know, that part is my fault but does that give someone the permission to go through and do something like that? That's like a burgler coming into your house and saying, well your window was open so it's free reign.

But in the good parts of my life I got to have Mexican food for lunch yesterday :) AND Alabama crushed Mississippi. I'm enjoying the games more and more the more that I understand what's going on. Plus it doesn't hurt that the end score was something like 31-3. I mean, watching a team as good as Alabama makes watching football way easier. Plus this time I didn't fall asleep in an evening game. I usually doze off, it's hard sitting on the couch for three hours!

I also had a really good conversation with my husband while driving home from a friend's house Friday night. We had briefly talked about goals that we have for our lives while there. The kind of thing if money, time, or locations weren't in the way what would you want to do with your life. His answer kind of lacked substance in my opinion and he finally said, I don't know, I don't really have any goals. Then he talked about being able to leave something to his children, pocket watches, something small and nice. I love that he always comes back to that. Wanting to leave something to his children because let's be honest, I want to have his babies! But on the drive back he asked me what mine would be and I said that I would like to own some land. I'd like to have a few farm animals, goats, sheep, maybe some chickens, a few more dogs. Jaime added horses to the list. I'd like to have room enough to garden. I'd like to be able to maybe someday have a dairy cow. It was a lot of fun to talk with him about something we both dream about someday having. Who knows if it will ever happen but it's nice to sit with my husband and imagine what it would be like if this dream came true. I mean, it's more than nice. It's that most comfortable place you can think of, it's everything is going right, it's total satisfaction. That's how I felt in the car as he drove me home. So many times marriage can seem like there are two people who are very different but live together and we mash our feelings and thoughts together to try to make one thing out of them. It's like braiding different ideas together and saying that they are one idea. Jaime and I aren't the kind of people who hide what we think or feel from people, we'll just let you know how it's going down. So our 'braid of ideas' never really convinces anyone that we see the same way about anything. But Friday night while we were driving we weren't braiding anything together, it was like floating down a stream of thoughts and dreams and futures, going the exact same way, effortlessly.
I know that I'm probably over romanticising this and Jaime might dry heave when he reads it ;) But it really was an amazing moment. Those good moments will make our marriage last longer I think.

I'm so excited about the Christmas season. Jaime and I are going to try to make new traditions for us as a family (us and our dogs). This is the first year that we won't be spending Christmas day in Anderson and I've figured that the best way to cope with this is to just let things happen and just roll with it. So part of this will be new traditions. Small traditions, but perhaps traditions that will last us the rest of our lives. Who knows. Like my parents, they bought these red ball christmas ornaments their first year of marriage and they still put them on the tree. They might not have thought at the time that years and years later they would still be putting those up but they are, and it's meaningful now. I think this year we should finally go out and get stockings for ourselves. Maybe someday I'll actually get around to quilting some stockings for us. I realized that we always have stockings at my parents and this year that it will be earlier than Christmas when we get those, wouldn't it be nice to still have a stocking on Christmas Eve, or Christmas Day? I'm so excited about Christmas. I want to put up the tree right now. :) Our Charlie Brown Christmas Tree. It's Huxley's first Christmas :)

I'm rambling :) I have a wedding to play this afternoon and I want to finish piecing all the blocks for the quilt I'm working on. That's a lot of work but I think that I have enough time tonight do that. It's been taking forever to get these blocks together. I guess that's what you get when you work all the time. December will be a good month for sewing I have a feeling.

Teeth and Thoughts

So today I have to go to the dentist. That's one of the problems with being a music teacher. I have all these kids lined up for lessons after school and then something happens like the dentist, or the doctor. Then I have to go through and cancel lessons for the day and move people around, it's like unraveling a sweater. This whole week I spent way too much time trying to figure out if I should cancel the dentist and reschedule it or cancel the lessons and reschedule them. I went back and forth about a million times. I thought, maybe they will have an opening in December when I won't be teaching lessons but honestly, something else would come up for me to cancel it for again.
My husband says that I have a problem being absent minded. I know I have a problem with it, it's like thoughts are just rushing through my mind and if I jump up I might grab one before it gets away but what if I didn't grab the right one? What if I forgot about which one I was supposed to have? Jaime tells me to simply finish what I'm working on and if I'm not doing something and something comes to mind do it right away. Case in point, checking the mail. I'll look through the mail, see something that needs to be attended to but then realize that I haven't let the dogs out. Five days later I find out that I forgot to pay the water bill. (This has never really actually happened, we always pay our bills on time, this is just an example) Similar things, however, do happen. Just ask my husband. I lose my cell phone about five times a day too.
So I decided to man-up and go to the dentist and was able to rearrange my teaching schedule fairly easily. I was so pleased with myself. But now I'm nervous about the dentist, and not nervous in the way you might think I'm nervous. I'm not really afraid of the drills or weird noises or that it's going to hurt me. I'm afraid of two things... three things. One is simple. I have these teeth that love to hold onto things when I eat them. One little crevice in particular loves to hold onto little pieces of gum after I've spat it out. Jaime always has to check my teeth after I chew gum. Oh gosh and after I eat any leafy greens my teeth seem to have kept half of the food to themselves! My mouth is riddled with it. I guess that's why they give you toothpicks. The thing is, I just ate a whole bunch of broccoli and now I'm wondering if I should let them know ahead of time, there might be leftovers in my teeth.
The second thing I worry about is cavities. Back in May I decided to go a whole month without sugar, if I could help it. Like, no candy, no sugar in coffee or tea, no desserts. Obviously there is sugar in somethings like plain cheerios, even veggies and fruits. Those were ok. The point is, my dental appointment was after that month and for the first time IN MY LIFE I had no cavities. This time, the dental appointment is after Halloween. It's after six bags of candy. It's after yesterday where I ate a whole large bag of m&ms. I brush, and I floss, and I also use that mouthwash stuff. We all know that I'm not going to stop eating candy any time soon so I guess that's the best I can do for now.
Third thing. Again with the candy. I love smarties. My husband tells me that I'm the only person who likes them but I know someone else does, Mom! See? More than one. The only problem is that I eat smarties with my front teeth, like a squirell eats a nut. This is the way that I do it, I'm not changing. Obviously I like doing it this way. Problem is though, that it wears the enamel on my teeth down.. and I've had two fillings done on my front teeth already. The other problem is that one of those fillings fell out a few months back.. My dentist tried to convince me that my bite was messed up and that I needed 'orthodontics' which is fancy talk for braces. I just told him, look, I've done the braces thing, I like my teeth the way they are, I like the way I eat, I'm sorry you have a problem with it but do the filling already ok?
I don't want another filling. I want God to send me four new teeth, the kind that doesn't wear away when you chew with them. Teeth made out of steel, but pearly white. Got that God? Ok good.

In general news today finds me rather frustrated. I think that I'm the kind of person that thinks they are right about things.. I mean, knows they are right about things. My way is better kind of thing. Is that Type A? There are things that I usually know I'm right about and when people ignore what I have to say I get really frustrated. This used to happen all the time with my college roommate. Love you! But she was the personality that just-didn't-give-a-you-know-what. That was frustrating. The other day I was driving with my husband to the Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 release (yes, it was at midnight, yes we stood in line in the freezing rain and yes I was one of the only girls there). He went around his behind to get to his elbow while driving. Now I love my husband and adore him so usually when he drives these crazy directions to get us somewhere and it takes twice as long I really don't mind. Because I love him you see? But most other people I don't love that much, so I'll let them know, You're going the wrong way, you know that, right? You are aware there are better ways of doing things, right?

It's this type of thinking that gets me in trouble. Not really trouble, but in uncomfortable situations. Having this mindset that I'm right about something makes me blind to people who aren't going to let their thoughts run as freely as mine. So I end up feeling like I've trampled over something really delicate. I said in my last post I talked about how I shouldn't be worried about what people think as much and I usually am not (just for some reason this blog got a little bit weird for me so I had to change it) and I'm not worried that someone would disagree with me because ususally when someone disagrees with me it means that they are wrong and it will be worse for them in the end. Because I'm always right. But this isn't always true! And that's what's so frustrating right now. There are some topics that are opinions, lots of topics. Things like, how to live your life, when to get married, what to major in in college, these things are opinion topics. Which way is the quickest way to Best Buy is not an opinion. But I'm stuck between 'My opinion is right' and 'Your opinion is different but also right' and I hate it.

I'm also beating around the bush. What I'm trying to say is that I feel very strongly about many things and usually when someone disagrees with me I don't worry about it but lately people have disagreed with me and I have worried about it. And that my friends is frustrating. This morning I thought it over and the more and more I thought about it the more I felt like I was cornered. That I was the only person who felt this way and everyone thought I was silly. I know that not everyone thinks I'm silly for feeling this way, but it's difficult for me to admit that my way is not 100% correct that there are many ways to get up to the mountain, I just perfer a certain path. And I want to say, if you don't want to walk the path that I chose then find your own way up. Mine's better though. Mine's prettier, it has better views. And see? Here I am back at the beginning trying to push my way on someone.
You see the problems I'm having? I like to think that because I think I'm right about lots of things (and by the way, if I don't know what I'm talking about I'll always let you know, I know that I'm right about the things I'm right about, get it?) it makes me a good teacher. So there are some good things that come of this I suppose.

Changes

When I was in college I had an online journal and I was so good at it. I was really into it. I think that it was easier for me to journal about things that came into my head because I didn't care who read it (hardly anyone knew about it) and I wasn't worried about what people thought of me. I'm still a little bit of the same person but now I worry about the people who read it. I worry who reads and what they will think and if it will change their impression of me. When I was in college the only people I interacted with were my friends and my professors so it didn't really matter what I wrote in my journal. Now that I'm out of college and into my real life I come into contact with so many other people and now that the internet is such a vivacious hit many people can come into contact with me online.

To be completely honest, I'm thrilled that people read my blog. I'm glad that many different people read my blog, I have parents of students, friends from college, my husband, my parents, imaginary internet friends I have yet to meet in real life. People from all over. But the catch is, what if I say something that my parents don't like?! What if I say something that offends one of my online friends? What if people don't approve? That's really the bottom line question. What if they don't approve.

I was reading through some of my old xanga journal entries and I loved reading about how open and honest I was with myself, how transparent I was. I miss that in my journals. One thing that I've always hated, I mean, hated, about people is fakeness (blogspot is telling me that this isn't a word). I think it's ok to hate it when someone is being fake. It's totally different to actually hate someone than to hate their actions. I feel like I've been sort of fake with this journal. I'm not trying to cover anything up but I honestly feel that I've been leaving things out.

I had a conversation with a friend recently about being fake. I was trying to impress upon her the importance of being fully who she really is. We're newish friends so we don't know a whole lot about each other but I know that there is a potential and honestly I'm not going to spend the time on someone who isn't being truthful to me. She likes to do things like say she's fine and then you realize later on that she isn't. So I called her out on it, twice I think, but in a loving way. If you aren't doing fine, I want to know, and I'll still care. I think it worked because the last time I talked to her she told me "Well, no I'm not doing fine but now's not the time to talk about it". I can take that, I can swallow that, go ahead and throw me another.

Point is, I'm being a bit fake myself with my journal and there are parts of me that really long for a place where I can just be me, to let it all out, the good and the bad. Because I've never been a fake person and I've never before been worried about what other people think. So why start now? I'm glad that I could get all this out lol. So if you've gotten bored while reading it, then stop reading :) I say that with a huge smile on my face! What I do mean to say is that although I'll keep updating pictures and grocery lists I think I'll try to make this place more real. More fun to read, more intimate, and more of me. I mean, anyone can write out lists of grocery items right? Or update pictures of their adorable dogs? Or go on cookie sprees for a month? Right?

So here's your warning. If you are nervous about what I just might honestly say then don't read anymore, but if you are really interested in what goes on in the life of Carrie Black then by all means, be my guest :) I always wrote more interesting things when I knew that people were reading anyway.

Grocery Time

Grocery shopping this week was a lot of fun because my husband came with me. He usually doesn't come because then I can get things done quicker and (usually) cheaper. But this time we came in right where we needed to be and I also really wanted to spend some time with him. He even gave me a 5 minute pep talk in front of the cinnamon rolls explaining exactly why I didn't need them and how I wouldn't just stop at one and how we've been filling ourselves with Halloween candy blah blah blah. As disappointed as I was to not get the cinnamon rolls I know that he's right. He can sometimes be the best thing for me. Actually. He is the best thing for me :) Plus after he got the receipt he ripped off the total on the bottom and handed me the list part and said "Here, this is for your blog". What a wonderful man :)

Enough lovey-dovey on with the groceries! This week I actually didn't have any meals planned out. We just bought what looked good and what we knew we would eat for lunches. It's nice to have a week like that isn't it?

Special K - after eating Cheerios the past two weeks Jaime asked if we could get some cereal that he could actually eat. I hope I'm not the only one that loves plain Cheerios.
Bisquick - had a coupon for this and it makes my favorite pancakes! Plus I looked up a killer recipe for monkey bread made with Bisquick and cinnamon and sugar. Woah!
Cheesy Rice and Broccoli Frozen veggies - I know you aren't supposed to get the kind with the sauce because it's all this added sodium and whatnot but whatever, the calories are still in a healthy range and who doesn't like cheese rice and broccoli? No one.
2 Totinos Pizzas
2 Boxes of Frozen Spinach - Aunt Nancy's Wedding Soup preparation, plus I had a coupon.
Generic Crystal Light Cherry Limeade - affectionately known as 'Drank' in our household. We go through this stuff like crazy. I should have bought more.
Dandruff Shampoo - Jaime! Even though I never really see the dandruff.. I think he's paranoid. Oh and speaking of Jaime's hair, he recently told me he was going to grow it out. I'm already having fits of passion thinking about running my hands through his thick wavy locks. Seems like this should be the other way around but my hair just won't do the thick and wavy. His though.. wonderful.
1 Big Tub of Low Fat Strawberry Yogurt - I need healthier snack.. healthier than tootsie rolls.
4 Yoplait Whips - Jaime's choice passion.
Quaker Rice Thingys - Jaime's snack
Flour! - Because I've been making too many dang cookies.
Mac and Cheese - just one box
Generic Fiber One Bars - I can't wait to eat these!
6 Eggs
Brussel Sprouts - sooo good I can't even believe they aren't more popular.
Nature's Own Whole Wheat Bread
Prego Meat Sauce - we love Prego and it helps us make up an easy meal super quick.
French Roast Generic Coffee - this past week I had Dunkin Donuts and I could either pay $2 or $6 for coffee this week. Guess what I picked. I have one more day's worth of DD though, and I'm going to milk it for all it's worth.
No Sugar Added Peach Cups - Jaime's snack to make sure he doesn't get scurvy. After knowing someone who had scurvy I guess he gets super paranoid about it from time to time :)
3 cans of Progresso Soup - I can eat the whole can for lunch, be full, get veggies in me, and still not over do it eating wise. Amazing. I love Progresso Soups, and I had a coupon for this one too.
Red Lunch Box - so Jaime can bring cold things to lunch now... like Whips.
Bananas!
Green Bell Pepper!
Granny Smith Apples!
and One Pomegranate

Total: $56.70

Not too shabby, but after reading through this list I'm thinking to myself.. what exactly are we eating this week? I'm sure we'll work something out. It's nice to not feel like an adult this week with groceries. How about we eat mac and cheese? No big deal. What about just having pizzas? Sure! Breakfast Burritos? Why not!

In other news my friend Sarah is graciously letting me read through her Harry Potter books. I read the first one years and years and years ago so right now I'm on the second. I need something to do when I get bored. I'm also reading through Grimm's Fairy Tales but those get a little bit repetitive when read in mass groups.